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“Well, it’s rather brutal here. We’re advising all of our clients to put everything they’ve got into tinned provisions and hunting rifles.” This nugget of sage advice comes from the Brain Gremlin – a genetically modified, talking, bespectacled member of the slimy Gremlin horde that overruns Manhattan’s super-smart Clamp Tower skyscraper in director Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. At first glance, it’s merely an portfolio pointer from one monster to another. But, curiously, it’s also pretty solid life advice. Seriously, listen to my reasoning.

When life takes a turn for the worse, the worst thing you can do is take things too seriously. The Brain Gremlin comprehends this. In fact, the majority of the dentally-gifted beasts that occupy Dante’s unrestrained 1990 movie (debateably his greatest) possess the same wry, meta sense of humour regarding the indistinct border separating daily routine and unadulterated chaos. It’s one element of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that maintains my loyalty – and with the passage of time, it’s the theme that strikes the deepest chord.

A Youthful Fixation

Of course, my connection with this movie wasn’t born on such an philosophical plane. In my youth, we only had a few scratched-up video tapes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its sequel, the latter housed in a thick former-rental sleeve almost certainly acquired from an off-brand video shop and boasting growling monsters on its tattered front. I was immediately enamoured and these films wasted no time embedding themselves inside my small, malleable brain. Henceforth, they became an near-everyday part of my youthful watching schedule.

Dante’s first film usually receives all the plaudits, thanks largely to its status as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins an incalculable number of times. That said, its sequel seldom receives the same level of high regard, which feels criminal. As a kid, I’d invariably jump at the prospect to watch Gremlins 2. During long summer holidays, I’d lock myself inside and pop it in. When I got my own TV-VHS combo unit, it stayed in constant rotation in my bedroom. With repetition, it ingrained itself in my mental framework. If my parents detected this preoccupation, they appeared unbothered.

Subtler Rewards and Societal Nuggets

As I matured, new insights enriched multiple watches, elevating the fun of watching small emerald creatures happily vandalize a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused real estate tycoon and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was based squarely upon the later-to-be-president Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) alluding to his second wife Marla Maples. Thankfully, Clamp has more heart than his actual-world equivalent.

The “apocalyptic” video Clamp plays during the height of creature carnage? I discovered it was based on a genuine “Doomsday” video produced by the CNN boss Ted Turner as a contingency for the world really ended. I noticed how Dante took extra pains to film alternate cuts of a self-aware scene where Gremlins hijack the very film you’re watching. One for cinemas, one for VHS and TV, each providing a grinning portion of fourth-wall-breaking cultural alchemy ahead of its time.

An Enduring Legacy

While it was effects expert Rick Baker’s wonderfully grotesque creatures that caught my eye as a child, this subsurface richness kept me hooked as an adult. In time, I even conversed with Dante about it myself and he had no reservations revealing to me he made the movie with the direct intention of mocking those who loved its silly-yet-sincere predecessor and desired a sequel. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he gleefully confessed. This Looney Tunes-esque rebelliousness and resolve to not take his sequel as seriously as his Warner Bros bosses clearly wanted him to, only increased my affection for it.

When I went through a sudden family bereavement recently, I was surprised to find that, during my deepest grief, all I felt compelled to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Weird, right? Possibly not. The soothing reminiscence it offered was needed to weaken my mind’s grief morass – but the insights it had bestowed upon me as an adult were equally valuable.

Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s certain elements in life you just can’t control. Dante is aware of it. The Brain Gremlin agrees completely. Sometimes, you have to be like them: welcome the pandemonium, invest all your resources into tinned provisions and hunting rifles and try not to take things too seriously.

It’s strong life advice from a very unlikely source – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my go-to cinematic solace.